The late Sheldon Vanauken asks whether it’s true that we lose our faith or choose to abandon it when it becomes convenient to do so:
We live in a secular world (so like that of Imperial Rome), and the blare of the TV is much louder than the church bells. Those who reject the faith are not, as C.S. Lewis once said, simply brave men who have logically accepted the defeat of their heart’s deepest longings for God. True, they may at moments have felt such longings, but, much more, they simply can’t be bothered to do God’s will. The truth is that, apart from rare moments, we don’t want Christ in our lives. We don’t want a God who knows the thoughts of our hearts, some of them rather nasty. Above all, we don’t want to be creatures: we want to be autonomous, free of any outside obligations or judgment.
Read the whole thing.
The issue isn’t really if, at some point in your past, you “made a decision for Christ” (or whatever language your tradition uses if it tries to avoid Pelagianism). The question really is if you are deciding for Christ right now. Later this afternoon. Tomorrow morning.